Cover Letter to an Agent: What we wish we could say…

Reblogged from the Hairball Gazette, my friend Ferne Horner’s cantankerous corner of the blogosphere…
Cover Letter to an Agent©
         FMHorner
Dear judge of all that is written,
with your glasses perched
at the end of your nose
coffee steaming at your elbow
and red pen poised to strike
like a snake coiled on a rock,
my success or failure
rests in your quivering hand
which will it be?
I hope this finds you
in a good mood
and that all is well
that you aren’t hung-over,
your kids weren’t busted
or your computer fried
it is my fervent wish
that your in-laws aren’t visiting
and that the new diet worked.
Here’s my stuff,
it’s brilliant, you’ll like it,
is that short enough?
The whole megillha
in two paragraphs or less—
well, sort of.
Enclosed is the
self-addressed, stamped
envelope you require,
you can steam off the stamp
and reject something else
since you’ll be keeping mine.
Writers, start your engines! This Frankensturmundrang may be just the break from routine you need to get writing, with your pen and notebook if necessary! Power outages are a blessing in disguise for those of us who scribble….
And it’s TIME, women writers, to GET SOMETHING TO THAT AGENT WAITING TO STEAM THE STAMP OFF YOUR SASE!
Write on!
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s